Saturday, August 01, 2009

im just a fuckin liar???


Don't believe that...?im just a big fuckin liar!!!!!
how could someone forget his whole life!
he was my everythin he was like breath that i need everyday...i just cant stop luvin him, he was a part of me and he still and he will be forevermore a part of me...how i wish to see him just for a second and how wish to wisper to him " i l...u...v....u..." and i'll luv u all the rest of life...
still his picture always in mind his smile,his sweetest words to me, his warm hugs for me...
i miss everythin of him i miss u so MOMOU...how i wish him to read these words really i miss him sooooooo
and i feel incomplete, weak,coward...without u ...
i know that he started a new life, i just wanna tell him i'll never regret him...and im regretin for everythin i've done to him even if he will not hear me or feel me...i'll say im regretin for everythin i'v done to him n how i wish to forgive me...because im such a fuckin stupid how could i lose the only person that i've spent all my life with him, that i spent all my life luvin him n i'll luv him till my last breath in life ...
for a time i feel that im the only obstacle in his life, and i was waitin for the time when he will say to me goodbye he never let me know what he was thinkin about?and never face me?maybe it was me the mistaken no no no im the mistaken! but maybe he was the mistaken too in a way or another we'r the two the mistakens why? simply because we never gave for us the chance to speak...
for everybody to read these words ..dont think im a jerk or somthin like that no? i just felt my fault and i was so depressed and can't talk to anyone...i just could write these sentences only to feel somkinda relaxion eventhough i'll never feel that relaxion as long as i lost my beloved "momou".hey everybody now i'll carry on my dream ...my dream of death because this is the only solution for my problem because im sure he will not take a look back and tryin to understand me and forgive me!!!???,...i've tried a lot to call him n speak to him but at each time i regain all my brave n courage i feel so afraid that he rejects me n so afraid to tell me i'v started my new life n i left u behind..........oooooofffffffffffffff im sick n tired of this shit life i don't know where am i?
can somone plssssssssssssss help me.......mayb i'v talked a lot but even i 'll spend all my life writin about my sweety, my luv, my sweetheart, king of my heart , my whole life , my breath,.....i'll not finish forevermore...
he lives with me me every second in my life im thinkin about him every secondtime im dreamin about him in my sleep n even in my wake...im always take his pictures n kiss him mybe this will make me feel his luv..."sorry my dear sorry billions of time sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy......................."

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