dream of death

life sucks

2012-01-08T09:54:00.000-08:00

I hate y saturday

I CRY U A RIVER

2011-03-07T10:32:00.000-08:00

OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
How i miss you sweety
How i wish to see you
How i wish to be with you
How i wish to be in your arms
How i wish to cry under your shoulders
How i wish to look in your eyes deep
How i wish to hold me tight
and make me forget everything
How i wish to make me regain my smile
How i wish to see me now when i'm writing
these words and cry you a river

you're not alone!

2009-08-01T13:27:00.001-07:00

i luv this song really i luv it n i hear everytime...mayb it expresses wht im feelin...?????????????

Another day has gone I'm still all alone How could this be You're not here with me You never said goodbye Someone tell me why Did you have to go And leave my world so cold Everyday I sit and ask myself How did love slip away Something whispers in my ear and says That you are not alone For I am here with you Though you're far away I am here to stay You are not alone I am here with you Though we're far apart You're always in my heart You are not alone All alone Why, oh

im just a fuckin liar???

2009-08-01T11:53:00.000-07:00

Don't believe that...?im just a big fuckin liar!!!!!

how could someone forget his whole life!

he was my everythin he was like breath that i need everyday...i just cant stop luvin him, he was a part of me and he still and he will be forevermore a part of me...how i wish to see him just for a second and how wish to wisper to him " i l...u...v....u..." and i'll luv u all the rest of life...

still his picture always in mind his smile,his sweetest words to me, his warm hugs for me...

i miss everythin of him i miss u so MOMOU...how i wish him to read these words really i miss him sooooooo

and i feel incomplete, weak,coward...without u ...

i know that he started a new life, i just wanna tell him i'll never regret him...and im regretin for everythin i've done to him even if he will not hear me or feel me...i'll say im regretin for everythin i'v done to him n how i wish to forgive me...because im such a fuckin stupid how could i lose the only person that i've spent all my life with him, that i spent all my life luvin him n i'll luv him till my last breath in life ...

for a time i feel that im the only obstacle in his life, and i was waitin for the time when he will say to me goodbye he never let me know what he was thinkin about?and never face me?maybe it was me the mistaken no no no im the mistaken! but maybe he was the mistaken too in a way or another we'r the two the mistakens why? simply because we never gave for us the chance to speak...

for everybody to read these words ..dont think im a jerk or somthin like that no? i just felt my fault and i was so depressed and can't talk to anyone...i just could write these sentences only to feel somkinda relaxion eventhough i'll never feel that relaxion as long as i lost my beloved "momou".hey everybody now i'll carry on my dream ...my dream of death because this is the only solution for my problem because im sure he will not take a look back and tryin to understand me and forgive me!!!???,...i've tried a lot to call him n speak to him but at each time i regain all my brave n courage i feel so afraid that he rejects me n so afraid to tell me i'v started my new life n i left u behind..........oooooofffffffffffffff im sick n tired of this shit life i don't know where am i?

can somone plssssssssssssss help me.......mayb i'v talked a lot but even i 'll spend all my life writin about my sweety, my luv, my sweetheart, king of my heart , my whole life , my breath,.....i'll not finish forevermore...

he lives with me me every second in my life im thinkin about him every secondtime im dreamin about him in my sleep n even in my wake...im always take his pictures n kiss him mybe this will make me feel his luv..."sorry my dear sorry billions of time sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy......................."

turn the page

2009-05-12T12:51:00.000-07:00

Forget him girl!
Forget his name, forget his face

Forget his sweet words and warm embrace

Forget the love that once was true

Remember now there’s someone new

Forget the way he used to talk

Forget how you memorized his walk

Forget the fights you two

now he’s happy not sad
Forget the times he made you cry

Forget the times when he was by your side

Forget the way he spoke your name

Remember now things aren’t be the same
Forget the love that once was shared

Forget the fact that he once cared

Forget how close you two were

Remember now he has chosen her

Forget the days that went so fast

Forget them all they’re just the past

Forget the promises he gave to you

Forget him girl, for he has FORGOTTEN YOU!

2009-01-22T10:57:00.000-08:00

wake me up when this nightmare ends!!??

2008-09-29T05:11:00.000-07:00

it seems ther's no farewell to my sadness????!!!!!

my farewell

2007-05-23T03:25:00.000-07:00

I think everything has an end ....
and this is the end of my darkness
my melancholy,my fearness
my bloody life, my .........................
i'll try to change my style of writing
even if i'll keep some of my attitudes
BUT just wait for something new ....
i'll be back with a new look hahahaha
hehehee
my best regards for all my friends of the blog
byeeeeeeee......"chek it out"

ROSE

2006-12-01T10:14:00.000-08:00

A rose in the rain

You broke, you lusted
You hurt, and you didn't mind!
You left a heart bleeding
You left a soul wounding
You left a green spirit lost
In madness and dismay
Eyes which find
No more tears to cry
Have you ever asked your self
What a childish stride you've taken?
Should you feel culpable?
Just take a look behind you
And see what you left over there?
You just left me a rose in the rain

save me...!!????

2006-12-01T10:02:00.000-08:00

Save me!

When everything is seen gloomy and faking
When life is been worthless and trivial
When days are turning as book's papers
When feelings and emotions are burning within a dead body
You linger for someone to wake you up
To wipe your tears away
To make a farewell to this nightmarish
But you still wait and ask for ……
Ask for salvation
Ask for deliverance …..
Waiting and standing just in vain
Call me up
Wake me up
Like you call the dead out
In a dark murky necropolis
Surrounding by the stroke of death
Taking your last breath
And say
Save me from my self….!!??

coming soonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

2006-11-24T10:43:00.000-08:00

Hi everybody just wait for somthing newwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww watch uppppppppppppppp

just think

2006-09-06T05:37:00.000-07:00

Never take someone for granted
Hold every person close to your heart
Because you might wake up one day
And realize that you’ve lost a diamond
While you were too busy collecting stones.

2006-09-06T05:19:00.000-07:00

Destiny of shadows
Lost in my thoughts
Wandering through the past
And fearing from the future
And standing confused from the present
But they say it's destiny
Sometimes I'm to lose my religion
Asking why should my destiny
Been what had been?
And what will be then…??!!!
But they say no one knows
What will happen tomorrow?
Destiny …….destiny………..destiny
Kneeling on my feet and asking my ALLAH

With a fervent plea
Release me from this dismay
Pave me a peaceful way
Realize my small hopes
And got me my wishes…..AMINE….

who's gonna make me smile but you?

2006-09-06T04:48:00.000-07:00

Smile of pain

They said: smile to life
Life will smile to you
But I forgot how to smile
Since you had gone away
I'm always trying to draw a smile
On my face
A gloomy smile, a faking one
Never reflects the inner of me
But shows the dark of me
I'm lying when I'm smiling
And make myself believe my lies
Talking to myself and say
Smile…..just smile……try to smile…..please
Who's gonna put my green smile again
Who's gonna make me feel the joy and the glee of life
At the time when all happiness is missing

Keeping asking will I regain my smile?

so far, sooooooooo

2006-08-22T06:47:00.000-07:00

Still further
You're everywhere
You're always there
But you're never here
Still with me is
Only ……..You
I hear you say
I LOVE YOU
But you're still there
And not here
You released others from soreness
But you prisoned me in

madness

just wish....!!!????

2006-08-22T05:37:00.000-07:00

Dead wishes

I still remember the killing words
Word by word, letter by letter
They crawled in my mind and ate
All of my memories of the past
I couldn't forget that cruel lines
How I wish to be died
Be released from this Melancholy
How I wish I'd never been
Never seen what I've seen
How I wish to be never lived
Never seen my soul fall
But they're only wishes
Dead wished of me

to flee from reality
And flee from all these deceptions ….

have u ever felt an insider iciness???

2006-08-20T07:17:00.000-07:00

Cold without you
Hush ………….
It's time to sleep
I lay down on my bed
Like a bed of thistles
Spinning and turning upon this bed
Try to kill the pain of thistles
Feel my self shaking inside
And asking my self
Am I cold?
I don't feel a true cold
But I feel an inner cold
A cold that aching me
A cold that tormenting me
Is it true?
Is it real?
Coldness because of the emptiness
The emptiness which you had left
I miss the warmth sit
I miss the warm embrace
Where are you?
Stealer of my smile
Giver of the tenderness
Don't leave me here alone
I can't take breaths without you

I'm lost without you
I'm desperate without you

And I'm cold without you.

it's for u dougie

2006-08-20T06:53:00.000-07:00

For DOUGIE

He read me on paper
He get me, he felt me
His greatest words
Make me regain my confidence
From his lines, I saw a light
Like a torch, tries to guide me
It gave me the hand of help
As a hand given to a drowned
I make my mind up to follow this light
Hopefully it will not fade away
And last beside me forever

shocked words

2006-08-19T06:14:00.000-07:00

This is a poem from a friend of mine " DOUGIE"

DOUGIE thanx alot for these great words

Love lost renewed and found.

Her words were penned with such dismay
All she wished for was death this day
Between the lines of her verse I feared her life
Could be no worse

For love had taken its terrible curse, her heart
cried out in pain each hour and day, again and again.
If only she could have a short relent, time to get back her
sanity and strength

Life’s great pathways twist and turn, a new
doorway opens and life regains
I hope for her, she opens that door and places
destiny in control once more

To see her eyes so clear and true, no more despair
showing through would be my wish
And one day to sit with her too chat and smile that would
make life worthwhile

luv sucks

2006-08-11T08:10:00.000-07:00

Phantom Pain
Around, all around, the dark memories gather

My dread grows as doom's scythe falls against my heart

It wounds me, and darkly my blood drips to the broken ground

In agony I call your name while nothingness surrounds me

Now alone, my cold tears fall upon my frozen cheeks

This is your love............

2006-08-11T07:25:00.000-07:00

Away from here

Lost in the darkness
Try to find a spotlight
Follow this hole of light
Walking toward it
Remaining walking and walking
Hope I can see something
Hope I can find another life
Hope I can feel and breath again
I see this light close to me
But it still far away from me
I want this light to guide me
To show me the endless path
Feel the darkness, feel the madness
Black clouds surrounding me
And the angry hand of heaven killing me
Can someone come and take me away
Take me away from here
Take me away…..where I forget my pain and sorrow

So come and take me away from here…!!!!

2006-08-10T12:23:00.000-07:00

My deep scream

bleeding, screaming,
yelling, crying,
who's left here alone
but me???????????
this is me aloneeee
this is me.......lost in the
madnesssss
can you hear my scream
can you hear me
call your name......

I LUV U, I MISS U

2006-08-10T12:02:00.000-07:00

special dedication

to the one i loved, to the one i love , to the one i'll love all the rest of life.....

I love you, I miss you

Solitude is hunting me
Agony is torturing me
Lonesome is killing me
And he still says I love you
And he still repeats I miss you
My face forgot how to smile
My eyes forgot how to shine
Me heart forgot how to trust
And he still says I love you
And he still repeats I miss you
No one can fix me
No word can bless me
No angels can save me
Until he comes back to me.

My favorite poem

2006-08-10T11:25:00.000-07:00

Dream of death

Hopeless life, endless pain
Remaining agony, blinding days
Waiting for something to happen
When all hope has past
Drifting through the black memories
Living in lies and try to believe
Asking, what I'm here for?
Nothing to lose, nothing to gain
No lethal injection to stop this life of hell
No bleeding stab to prevent this cascade of tears
It is easy to die on paper
But it is hard to make it real
So go to sleep and dream of death
Maybe one day your dream will come true…!!?

i adore this picture

2006-08-10T08:50:00.000-07:00

i love this picture ,really i love it.....???!!!!!
this is why i wrote this few words instead of speaking or seeing:

A question for you?

In a silent night
Stare at the moon
Stare at the stars
Ask them about
What makes me cry?
Ask them about
My burning heart
Ask them about
My lost love
Ask them about
My insignificant life
Ask them what I'm here for?
Begging them to answer me
To find no answer.............!!!
And let the question for you
What have you done to me?

My first poem

2006-08-10T08:39:00.000-07:00

this is my first poem i've written

My eternal agony

I stand in the darkness
With a silent sight
With a frozen and empty soul
Wounding by the lonesome
With bloody tears of my cold eyes
Fall to whisper to my injured heart
About the memories we had
About the moments we shared
But wake up again
To find my self alone in the shadows
Of my pain and sorrow
To realize that your lost love
Made me live in an eternal agony ……..